Divorce is never easy. Even when you and your spouse agree it’s the best decision and maintain a mutual respect and amicable relationship with each other, you are still likely to experience emotions such as sadness, guilt or a sense of failure.
These emotions are normal, and you will need time to heal and work through them. However, a divorce involves making many major, complex decisions, which should be made based on logic, not emotion.
This means that the emotions you are processing as you go through the divorce process can sometimes prevent you from making the best choices.
Learn about the divorce process
Remember that your divorce is temporary, and it will be behind you one day. The divorce process can feel overwhelming, especially at the beginning, when you are dealing with mountains of complex paperwork and deadlines.
It helps to learn about the different steps in the divorce process ahead of time, so you have some idea of what to expect. This can reduce stress and help you remember that each step brings you closer to a resolution.
Allow yourself to grieve
At the same time, recognize that you deserve the time and opportunity to mourn the end of your marriage. Allow yourself to engage in whatever grieving process works best for you but recognize that you should keep it separate from the logistical aspects of your divorce.
Having a strong support system of friends and family can help you through your divorce but be careful about relying on their opinions or advice. They might tell you horror stories about their divorces while thinking that they are helping you.
Additionally, beware of people who encourage you to get revenge on your spouse, act disrespectfully or encourage poor behavior. This is only going to hurt you in the end.
Just as everyone’s marriage is unique, so is everyone’s divorce. A professional with your best interests in mind can be a valuable guide during this time.