DiLorenzo & Rush | Counselors of Law
Stepping Up & Standing Out

: What are the crucial questions I should ask before marriage?

On Behalf of | Feb 23, 2024 | Family Law

Navigating the path to a successful marriage begins with open communication and addressing crucial questions prior to marriage. The aftermath of marriages that lacked discussions on key topics is divorce One way to set out on a happy life together is to start these discussions before the marriage begins.

Family planning

The first time you discuss family planning should not be post-marriage. Discuss desires for children, including when and how many. Misalignment on this fundamental issue can lead to significant future conflicts.

Living arrangements

Explore where you both envision settling down, considering city or state preferences and the desired setting (urban, suburban, rural, etc.). Your alignment on living arrangements is vital to prevent disagreements later on. After all, a small-town person may not be able to live in a big city and vis versa.

Financial planning

Many marriages implode because of financial difficulties. Address financial goals, spending habits and how responsibilities will be shared up front. Money matters are a common source of marital conflict, making an open and honest discussion crucial to a successful marriage.

When you negotiate a prenuptial agreement, you can decide in advance how you will divide your marital property should your marriage later end in divorce. By discussing these matters now, before you’re married, you and your partner will be able to be knowledgeable about your resources and honest about your expectations. This can strengthen your marriage so that, hopefully, you won’t ever actually need to use the prenuptial agreement.

Career aspirations

Talk about your career aspirations and goals. Understand each other’s career goals, potential relocations and the support each other needs for professional growth. Aligning on career aspirations helps navigate potential future challenges.

Conflict resolution and communication strategies

If you have not already figured out whether your communication styles and conflict resolution strategies align, you should explicitly discuss strategies for handling conflicts and disagreements. Establishing effective communication during challenging times strengthens the relationship. Do not wait to learn how to communicate in therapy during marriage to avoid divorce. Start the therapy now, or at least start talk talking now.

Expectations for marriage

Talk about why you want to be married and what you expect from the marriage. Share and discuss expectations regarding roles and responsibilities within the marriage. Aligning on these expectations helps in fostering a harmonious partnership.

Relationship maintenance

Marriages do not flourish without work. Plan how you will keep the dating spark alive during the marriage. Plan for sustaining a strong relationship through regular date nights, open communication and strategies to keep the connection alive. Investing in the relationship’s health contributes to long-term success.